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ISL A Meet

May 11, 2019 (Morning)

Exercise Type: Run

Comments:
I think I've put off logging this long enough. I've been really bad about logging recently, I think because I don't want to think about these being some of my last runs of high school, but I also don't want to forget these last memories, so here I am.

I never thought I'd get to run at the ISL A championships, so when Anthony asked me the day before the B championships whether I'd like to run in the A's, I was very excited, but also quite nervous. I had a lot of self doubt about belonging there in the week leading up to them, but it was super exciting to step onto the infield for the first time (since I've only ever been a spectator). I was running the 1600 with Maddi and Tara. Had a lovely warmup with them and talked about good memories from the team to distract us. I wasn't feeling too good, but tried to ignore it and stay relaxed. I think I did pretty well at that. For once, we had enough time to fully warmup, so got to the line feeling ready. I was worried I'd be the last one in the race, which would have been okay, but turned out I was actually well matched with some other runners. First lap was fast! Actually first 800 was fast. Too fast (3:10), and I knew it, but just figured what the hell, last race, big meet, why not see what I can do. I think in retrospect going out a little slower would have been smarter. My surroundings blacked out a bit, I wasn't even really hearing people cheer that first half of the race. Came through the 800 about 5 seconds behind Tara and really tried to catch her, but I really just couldn't. The race went downhill a bit after that. Slowed down a lot in the third lap and got passed by a number of people in the third and forth lap. It wasn't me giving up like some early races this season—I gave it my all—but I just went out way too fast and couldn't maintain it. I finished in 6:41 which is an SR by one second and a tie of my PR from freshman year or possibly a PR by milliseconds. I haven't checked because I don't really care. This race reminded me of an interesting thing about this sport. It's a sport so focused on time where every millisecond can count, but really, for me at least, that's not what really matters. On paper, from what I just said, this would be a great race simply because it was my fastest this season and maybe ever. And sure, probably some of my frustration is because it was just barely faster and if I'd PR'd by 5 seconds I would have been happy, but I think I also could have run five seconds slower, but run a much better race that I would have been happier with. I still feel really lucky that I got to experience running in the A meet, but it felt like an unsatisfying and kind of upsetting last race of high school. But it's okay because I got a satisfying "race" a few days later...

Also, Ella Gillespie is an icon!